my new goal, as of yesterday, is to read all of Maya Angelou's books.
if you haven't heard of this woman, i pity you.
she is one of the most amazing writer's i've come across, and has such a beautiful soul.
i bought "Letter to my Daughter" yesterday, and wanted to share a passage that moved me-
"You may not control all of the events that happen to you, but you can decide not to be reduced by them. Try to be a rainbow in someone's cloud. Do not complain. Make every effort to change things you do not like. If you cannot make a change, change the way you have been thinking. You might find a new solution.."
Sunday, February 8, 2009
Tuesday, October 14, 2008
word.
i never post on this thing. partially because i don't have anything to blog about, and also because sometimes i forget i have this thing.
so, here is an update on life...
so, here is an update on life...
-i'm working on being happy. it's been a long time since i can truly say that i was content in every aspect of my life. i'm finding that what i used to think i want, is really not what i want anymore. i'm finding that some things are out of reach, and some things are not meant to be. (that might be confusing, but it makes sense in my head.)
-my bff, kaity friday, got electrocuted yesterday by a coke machine. (i don't know why i put that, i just thought it was pretty funny. she on the other hand will not.)
-school has been pretty stressful lately. every day i sit in A&P, i re-think wanting to be a nurse. but, i know in the long run when i finally am one, all the school crap will be worth it.
-i decided if i wasn't going to be a nurse, i'd be a chef.
-i haven't seen my sister in 3 days, and we live in the same house. goes to show you how conflicting both of our schedules are. i miss her.
-i want a dog so bad, and i have the backyard for it. they are just so darn expensive with the food, shots, heartworm meds..blahblahblah. : [
-sometimes i just have the urge to quit my jobs/school, pack up everything in a suitcase, and move to another country and just start a new life there. then i think about my mother murdering me, and that thought quickly exits my mind.
-i want to get involved in a boys&girls club, or something of that nature. i figure any free time i have should be spent doing things like that.
-i have become such an impatient person when driving. i have road rage like you've never seen. rarely do i ride in the car and not yell at someone for being a sucky driver.
-there is absolutely no food in my house.
-i am surviving off of coffee and oatmeal. oh, the joys of being a broke college student.
-the holidays are coming up...and i am PUMPED.
take care, my friends.
i love you all.
Monday, September 8, 2008
oh, life.
as of lately, i have been going through a very difficult time in my life. i've lost something that's been a part of me for a really long time....and i haven't known really how to cope with my loss.
however, i have had a break through. i can't really change what is happening, no matter how much i think that i can. it's out of my hands. and sitting around and feeling sorry for myself is helping how? exactly. it's not. it only makes things worse. therefore, i have come to the conclusion that i am going to be positive. i don't know what the future has in store for me. only time will tell. time is what is going to heal me. that, and my faith. my hope. i still hurt. i don't know if that will really ever go away....but i'm going to be ok. my heart is going to be ok. it has to be. there is no other option. i have no other choice but to keep living. keep striving through every day. no matter how hard, i can handle it. these past few years have made me a strong person, and i will continue to be strong. nothing will break me.
this felt good.
: ]
i love you all.
thank you to those of you who are helping me get through this.
i don't know what i would do without you, seriously.
however, i have had a break through. i can't really change what is happening, no matter how much i think that i can. it's out of my hands. and sitting around and feeling sorry for myself is helping how? exactly. it's not. it only makes things worse. therefore, i have come to the conclusion that i am going to be positive. i don't know what the future has in store for me. only time will tell. time is what is going to heal me. that, and my faith. my hope. i still hurt. i don't know if that will really ever go away....but i'm going to be ok. my heart is going to be ok. it has to be. there is no other option. i have no other choice but to keep living. keep striving through every day. no matter how hard, i can handle it. these past few years have made me a strong person, and i will continue to be strong. nothing will break me.
this felt good.
: ]
i love you all.
thank you to those of you who are helping me get through this.
i don't know what i would do without you, seriously.
Thursday, July 24, 2008
movie of the year.
no words can ever describe Ledger's performance in the Dark Knight. the entire movie i was completely enthralled with every scene. i thought this movie was brilliantly made, and had a wonderful team of actors. AMAZING.
r.i.p. heath.
we lost a good one.
Saturday, July 12, 2008
the wonderful works of Ms. Dickinson.
I measure every grief i meet with analytic eyes;
I wonder if it weighs like mine,
or has an easier size.
I wonder if they bore it long, or did it just begin?
I could not tell the date of mine,
it feels so old a pain.
I wonder if it hurts to live, and if they have to try,
and whether, could they choose between,
they could not rather die.
I wonder if when years have piled-some thousands-on the cause
of every early hurt, if such a lapse could give them any pause;
Or would they go on aching still, through centuries above,
enlightened to a larger pain by contrast with the love.
The grieved are many, I am told; the reason deeper lies,-
death is but one and comes but once,
and only nails the eyes.
There's grief of want, and grief of cold, a sort they call 'despair;'
there's banishment from native eyes,
in sight of native air.
And though I may not guess the kind correctly, yet to me-
a piercing comfort it affords, in passing calvary.
To note the fashions of the cross, of those that stand alone,
still fascinated to presume that some are like my own.
I wonder if it weighs like mine,
or has an easier size.
I wonder if they bore it long, or did it just begin?
I could not tell the date of mine,
it feels so old a pain.
I wonder if it hurts to live, and if they have to try,
and whether, could they choose between,
they could not rather die.
I wonder if when years have piled-some thousands-on the cause
of every early hurt, if such a lapse could give them any pause;
Or would they go on aching still, through centuries above,
enlightened to a larger pain by contrast with the love.
The grieved are many, I am told; the reason deeper lies,-
death is but one and comes but once,
and only nails the eyes.
There's grief of want, and grief of cold, a sort they call 'despair;'
there's banishment from native eyes,
in sight of native air.
And though I may not guess the kind correctly, yet to me-
a piercing comfort it affords, in passing calvary.
To note the fashions of the cross, of those that stand alone,
still fascinated to presume that some are like my own.
Friday, May 30, 2008
i've been tagged, yo.
Rules of the game:Answer the questions and tag five other people. Be sure to post a comment on their blog letting them know they have been tagged. [sorry, i'm not going to play by the rules because everyone i know has already been tagged. therefore, i'm just doin this for fun.]
What were you doing 5 years ago?
1. preparing for my LONG high school career.[woot!]
2. enjoying the summer.
3. dang, i was 14.
4. probably hanging out with my chum, sara.
5. being hardcore.
What are 5 things on your to do list today?
1. the day is over, so here are 4 things i did-
2. ate lunch with danielle and sara.
3. went to my sister's house.
4. took a nap. [that was rudely interrupted by my brother who doesn't know what the word quiet means.]
5. went to denton with my mother.
What are 5 snacks you enjoy?
1. oranges.
2. doritos.
3. yogurt.
4. pickles.
5. bagel w/ cream cheese.
What are 5 things you would do if you were a billionaire?
1. donate a crap load to charity.
2. put some away for school, of course.
3. buy my grandparents a new car.
4. buy a house.
5. buy alot of puppies.
What are 5 of your bad Habits?
1. PROCRASTINATING.
2. i can be a slob sometimes. [ok, all the time.]
3. i eat when i'm bored.
4. popping my knuckles.
5. belching really loud on occasion.
What are 5 places you have lived?
1. house in Lewisville on Sweetbriar.
2. house in Lewisville on Stemmons.
3. first house in sanger on Keaton.
4. second house where my rents live now.
5. crumley on UNT campus. [a.k.a.-hell.]
What are 5 jobs you've had?
1. Gattis pizza. [i worked with all boys, and they made me wash dishes the whole time.]
2. Mcdonalds.
3. Red River Pump. [shout out to my boy, joel!]
4. Luxxi.
5. Presby of Denton.
What 5 people do you want to tag?
1. your mom.
What were you doing 5 years ago?
1. preparing for my LONG high school career.[woot!]
2. enjoying the summer.
3. dang, i was 14.
4. probably hanging out with my chum, sara.
5. being hardcore.
What are 5 things on your to do list today?
1. the day is over, so here are 4 things i did-
2. ate lunch with danielle and sara.
3. went to my sister's house.
4. took a nap. [that was rudely interrupted by my brother who doesn't know what the word quiet means.]
5. went to denton with my mother.
What are 5 snacks you enjoy?
1. oranges.
2. doritos.
3. yogurt.
4. pickles.
5. bagel w/ cream cheese.
What are 5 things you would do if you were a billionaire?
1. donate a crap load to charity.
2. put some away for school, of course.
3. buy my grandparents a new car.
4. buy a house.
5. buy alot of puppies.
What are 5 of your bad Habits?
1. PROCRASTINATING.
2. i can be a slob sometimes. [ok, all the time.]
3. i eat when i'm bored.
4. popping my knuckles.
5. belching really loud on occasion.
What are 5 places you have lived?
1. house in Lewisville on Sweetbriar.
2. house in Lewisville on Stemmons.
3. first house in sanger on Keaton.
4. second house where my rents live now.
5. crumley on UNT campus. [a.k.a.-hell.]
What are 5 jobs you've had?
1. Gattis pizza. [i worked with all boys, and they made me wash dishes the whole time.]
2. Mcdonalds.
3. Red River Pump. [shout out to my boy, joel!]
4. Luxxi.
5. Presby of Denton.
What 5 people do you want to tag?
1. your mom.
Friday, May 16, 2008
: ]
stole this from rob.
enjoy.
i am: a really great friend.
i think: i'm a little sunburned from the lake this morning.
i need: more sleeeep.
i know: i have cool friends.
i want: my birthday to get here.
i have: a sweet guitar. (sharona)
i wish: i hadn't scarfed down that baked potato loaded with butter and cheese.
i hate: when people are one sided, and don't consider other people's points of view.
i miss: my boyfriend.
i fear: the bathrooms at the lake.
i feel: full.
i hear: the t.v. in the living room.
i smell: my house.
i crave: something sweet.
i search: all the time in life.
i wonder: constantly.
i regret: just one thing...that almost ruined my life.
i love: my mother.
i ache: when i'm sick. my whole body aches.
i care: for everyone. even when they don't care for me.
i always: wear the ring robbie gave me.
i am not: a fake person.
i believe: in jesus. in others. in myself.
i dance: whenever i get the chance.
i sing: quite loudly in my car.
i don't always: exercise like i should.
i fight: when i have something worth protecting.
i write: when i'm upset, and need to get things off my chest.
i win: at scene it. [bring it, sucka]
i lose: at almost any other game.
i never: have been to disneyworld. [*gasp*]
i confuse: other people when i try to give them directions.
i listen: when people talk to me.
i can usually be found: at work. at home. at kaity's.
i am scared: of losing the ones i love.
i need: love.
i am happy about: going to six flags on monday : ]
enjoy.
i am: a really great friend.
i think: i'm a little sunburned from the lake this morning.
i need: more sleeeep.
i know: i have cool friends.
i want: my birthday to get here.
i have: a sweet guitar. (sharona)
i wish: i hadn't scarfed down that baked potato loaded with butter and cheese.
i hate: when people are one sided, and don't consider other people's points of view.
i miss: my boyfriend.
i fear: the bathrooms at the lake.
i feel: full.
i hear: the t.v. in the living room.
i smell: my house.
i crave: something sweet.
i search: all the time in life.
i wonder: constantly.
i regret: just one thing...that almost ruined my life.
i love: my mother.
i ache: when i'm sick. my whole body aches.
i care: for everyone. even when they don't care for me.
i always: wear the ring robbie gave me.
i am not: a fake person.
i believe: in jesus. in others. in myself.
i dance: whenever i get the chance.
i sing: quite loudly in my car.
i don't always: exercise like i should.
i fight: when i have something worth protecting.
i write: when i'm upset, and need to get things off my chest.
i win: at scene it. [bring it, sucka]
i lose: at almost any other game.
i never: have been to disneyworld. [*gasp*]
i confuse: other people when i try to give them directions.
i listen: when people talk to me.
i can usually be found: at work. at home. at kaity's.
i am scared: of losing the ones i love.
i need: love.
i am happy about: going to six flags on monday : ]
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